Of Cabbage Rolls and Kings

"The time has come," the Walrus said,
"To talk of many things:
Of shoes--and ships--and sealing-wax--
Of cabbages--and kings--
And why the sea is boiling hot--
And whether pigs have wings."

                                -Lewis Carroll

                                Through The Looking Glass

A few weeks ago our beloved cafeteria served cabbage rolls.  These stuffed delights were topped with a tomato sauce, some cheddar cheese, and a dollop of sour cream, but not before being laid on a bed of rice.  They looked so good that they made me wonder if they had been made by somebody's grandmother who emigrated from Europe.

I was a little disappointed that the rice under the cabbage rolls was undercooked and had a slightly crunchy texture.  I have to be a little forgiving with plain rice, however, as it can go from undercooked to overcooked in as little as three minutes.  At least I am happy to report that the rice was genuine rice this time, and not the instant rice that was served with the Chinese combo last month.  I am also happy to report that the dollop of sour cream on top was proportionally correct, which was not the case a few weeks ago with the latkes.  Things are looking up.

Speaking of improvements, I am also happy to note that I have recently noticed some pleasant changes in the cafeteria.  The metal cutlery bins are full of clean cutlery at the beginning of the meal service time, the french fries are being kept in a heated area (although one of my classmates informed me that in spite of this measure her fries were still cold), and another classmate communicated to me that fries now come with a much more suitable portion of gravy than they used to.  Even though these changes are not entirely perfect, I am nevertheless quite proud of the improvements that have taken place.  My congratulations to the cafeteria staff for making the effort to mend these past errors. But I digress.

Yes, the time has come to talk about cabbages--or in this case cabbage rolls.  They were a little mild in spices, but otherwise delicious.  Stuffed with rice and ground beef, these little leaf-wrapped delights made me wish that I were in a little village in Eastern Europe, sitting around a humble kitchen table with a dentally-challenged family who were all telling me in their thick accents that I was too skinny and I should eat more. 

I highly recommend the cabbage rolls to any visitors who come to the VIU cafeteria.  Just be prepared to quote Lewis Carroll in-between bites.

Chicken and Risotto Repast

Occasionally forgetting to bring my lunch to school has its advantages and its disadvantages.  Normally it means that I have an opportunity to review a new food at the cafeteria, so I actually am quite happy on the days when I neglect to bring my lunch with me.  Then there are the days when I forget my lunch and there is nothing on the menu that is appealing.  This was one of those days.  At the suggestion of my classmates I had made plans to order fries with some gravy on the side so I could microwave the gravy before pouring it over top (see my post "Ce N'est Pas la Poutine"), however the culinary students on this day were not prepared to serve lunch.  After standing in line for five minutes while I waited for the students to be ready, I observed that the only prepared batch of fries had sat cooling without so much as the assistance of a heat lamp.  Even the employees at McDonalds know to discard a batch of fries that have been sitting under a heat lamp for that long, let alone a batch of fries that did not have the assistance of a heat lamp.  It would seem that I would need to choose another meal option.

On the related subject of customer service, I would like to point out that not presenting customers with the option of metal cutlery in an era of environmental concern is quite disappointing.  I can understand the cafeteria running out of clean metal cutlery half-way through the lunch-hour rush; however this was at the beginning.  Between the cold fries and the lack of metal cutlery, this was not looking good.  I was very disappointed in the poor customer service this day.

Since there was nothing exciting on the menu, plan B involved a rather plain lunch of baked chicken, risotto, and vegetables.  It did not excite me, especially after hearing my classmates complain about some dry chicken that the cafeteria had served only a few days earlier.  Nevertheless, I was looking forward to trying the risotto.

I am pleased to say that the baked chicken was juicy and hot, with a wonderful crispy skin on the outside.  While it lacked some herbs, it was still quite flavorful thanks to the natural juices that remained in the bird from cooking.  Likewise, the sautéed vegetables were also delicious.  If only I could say some nice things about the risotto. 

Risotto, a starchy rice dish, is supposed to be served with the rice having the same al dente texture as pasta, and the consistency of a thick stew.  The risotto that the cafeteria served, however, was neither.  It may have had a wonderful mushroom flavor, but it had a consistency that was so thick it stuck to my plastic spoon in a large lump when I turned it up-side down.  Additionally, the aborio rice was so undercooked that hours later I was still searching for a toothpick to remove it from my teeth.  This was not good.

Unfortunately, I cannot recommend the risotto (unless the culinary students have since learned a lesson in how to cook risotto, such as this one).  I would also like to see the fries be served hot, and for the cafeteria to have metal cutlery ready at the beginning of every meal service.  In the meanwhile, I can at least recommend the chicken.  The chicken is, rather appropriately, tender enough to eat with the plastic forks and knifes that are provided, and for this I am grateful.

Hot Apple Cider and Happiness

It's -6° outside, not including the wind chill, so what could be a more appropriate food to review but a warm drink.

A few weeks ago I dropped into the Jumpin' Java coffee shop, which is located in Building 305, and ordered a hot apple cider.  This was not the same caramel apple cider that is treated to a shot of caramel syrup and topped with a dollop of whipped cream that the famous Seattle-based chain serves.  No, this was the kind of hot apple cider that you used to drink at holiday parties as a child while you sang Christmas carols with your Aunt Beatrice and looked through the window at the icy white snowflakes congregating in the yard.  This was the type of drink that needed to meet the high standards of sentimentality.

In spite of what some may think, there are actually several ways to make a hot apple cider.  Some baristas will have you believe that a hot apple cider is simply warm apple juice or an instant powdered mix with added water (*shudder*), but there is more to the drink than that.  A good hot apple cider will have the flavors of cinnamon sticks, orange peel, and cloves infused throughout the apple juice.  The flavors will taste as though they have been simmering for several minutes (or better, yet, several hours).  An even better hot apple cider would have all this and be made from raw apple juice, which is cloudy. Raw apple juice, however, is expensive and difficult to find, so most coffee shops stick to using ordinary apple juice.  I wasn't sure what to expect from an independent coffee shop, such as the Jumpin' Java.

On a side note, I would like to pause here and address the topic of customer service.  While I am a food reviewer, the fact remains that customer service is a part of an overall food experience.  I seldom mention this in my blog posts because most of the time the customer service is fairly standard.  I feel the need to mention it here, however, because I was very impressed with the service that I received at Jumpin' Java.  Both of the baristas who served me were happy, polite, and hasty, even though there was no line-up to make them rush my order.  I was impressed; kudos to them for holding to those standards while serving hundreds of coffee-craving students.

As I stated earlier, my hot apple cider arrived quickly and I was delighted to have my first sip.  The flavors of the spices in the cider were neither weak nor overpowering.  I could tell that it had been made from apple juice, and that there was no instant mix involved with this drink.  It was simply wonderful.

I highly recommend the hot apple cider and the customer service at Jumpin' Java.  And at this time of year, I also recommend that after you order your hot apple cider you go find some students and ask them if they would like to sing Christmas carols with you.

Happy Hannukah!

Sure, most of the students on campus are gentiles, but it's nice to see the cafeteria celebrating the start of Hanukkah this week by putting latkes and salmon on the menu for not only the Jewish students, but also those of us with a curious palette.  For readers who are unfamiliar with Jewish traditions and teachings (most folks aren't because the stories of this event are not found in the more popular Hebrew Bible, but rather in the Jewish apocryphal books), perhaps I should add a quick Hebrew history lesson with this post, so it will help you to have a better understanding of the important role that fried food plays during the Festival of Lights. 

During the second century BCE, the Jewish people were taking part in a revolt which resulted in them regaining Jerusalem and rededicating the Second Temple.  During this time the only oil found in the temple that had remained sealed by the High Priest, and had not been profaned by the soldiers of Antiochus IV, was a mere one-day supply for the temple's menorah (lamp).  This was a problem for the Jews because it takes eight days to press olive oil.  You can do the math to figure that out.  At any rate, the Levite priests used that oil to light the menorah, and miraculously it remained lit for eight days--a period now named Hanukah.  Because of this historical event, oil, and thus fried food, plays a large part in celebrating Hanukah.  Latkes are one of those fried foods.  They are a potato pancake that is shallow-fried in oil, so they are a perfect food for Hanukah celebrations.

For those of you who have never had latkes before and would like to try making them, I have good news for you:  they are easy to make if you are morally willing to take some shortcuts.  The easiest method is to thaw some frozen shoestring hash browns and wring them out in a tea towel or paper towel until they are relatively dry.  Then add them to some instant pancake mix and add milk until it forms a thick batter.  Place a few tablespoons of oil in a cast iron fry pan or hot skillet and spoon about 1/3 cup of the batter into the oil.  Flip them when they are a crisp and golden brown to ensure even cooking and serve them warm, topped with applesauce or sour cream.

I am pleased to say that the cooks in the cafeteria did not take shortcuts with their potatoes.  The grey color of their latkes, while unattractive, was an indicator that they used freshly-grated potatoes which were not coated in preservatives (unlike their frozen friends) to prevent oxidization.  There were a few non-traditional ingredients in these latkes, however.  For some odd reason the culinary staff chose to prepare these latkes by using a savory herb (I believe it was marjoram, although I am unsure).  While I was a little disappointed that the latkes were not a traditional recipe, and while I am also not a fan of whatever herbs were in these latkes, I must admit that kosher cooks agree that there is nothing wrong with giving the recipe a modern twist.  It would have been nice to have the latkes presented in their traditional round shape, and not in the rectangle cut-outs that the cafeteria used, however I understand that the cafeteria's need for quantity sometimes overrules the need for quality.  This also explains why the latkes were unusually thick and were mushy on the bottom, instead of crispy.  Nevertheless, I am going to overlook those last two drawbacks simply because of the challenges of corporate cooking.  The latkes were served in the cafeteria with the traditional condiments of applesauce and copious amounts of sour cream (perhaps a little too much sour cream), that were appropriate for the dish.  I was happy to see those included with the meal.

It's a Jewish holiday, so what kosher lunch wouldn’t have a little bit of fish?  Fish is a culinary challenge for most kitchen personnel.  On the one hand, it heats quickly and is supposed to be served barely-cooked.  On the other hand, most consumers treat their fish like a heartier protein and prefer it to be firm and slightly over-cooked.  I was curious to see how the staff would handle this dilemma, and I have to say that I am very impressed.  The fish was just a little more than barely-cooked, so it was still tender, yet it was just firm enough to satisfy those of us who prefer their meat to be hearty.  It appeared to have been poached, which is the best, yet most finicky, method for bringing out the flavor of the fish.  It was delicious, and my classmates and I raved about it.  For this, I would like to say a big mazel tov to the kitchen staff.

Before I give my overall impression of the meal, I need to review the vegetables that came with it.  Don't ask me why, but for some reason I was served curried vegetables with my Hanukah meal.  Not only do I know that curry is not a traditional spice in kosher cuisine, but I am also convinced that it is not a pleasant combination with latkes.  It may have tasted fine with the salmon, but it was repulsive with the latkes.  Clearly the chef in charge was not aware of how wrong it was from a religious, cultural, and a culinary perspective, to have this flavor on the same plate as latkes.  I am hoping that none of the Jewish students on campus were as unimpressed as I was by this amalgamation.

In spite of some of the undesirable aspects of this meal, I have to say that I nevertheless would have this again anytime (although I would make sure to ask for vegetables that are not curried), and I would definitely recommend it to other students.  It's wonderful to see the chefs in the cafeteria making an effort to celebrate a cultural holiday that comes with unique foods.  It also makes me hope that matzoh ball soup will be on the menu for Passover.

Ce N'est Pas la Poutine

Ah, poutine!  We Canadians are proud to call this guilty pleasure of fries, squeaky cheese curds, and gravy our own.  Nearly every restaurant in Quebec serves the dish, and it is even served as a special treat to our Canadian troops serving overseas.  Yes, it is without a doubt that we associate poutine with Canada.  There is nothing more wonderful than celebrating our heritage with a dish of hot fries covered in fresh, squeaky, white cheddar cheese curds and plenty of hot gravy.  Unfortunately, the cafeteria at VIU does not serve poutine.  Yes, it's on the menu, but what they will serve you is fries with a small handful of grated mozzarella and yellow cheddar, topped with a tiny amount of gravy.  To make it even worse, the poutine that I was served at the cafeteria had fries that were barely warm, and gravy that was not even hot enough to melt the grated cheese.  It was a very sad day for all Canadians, and I felt a strong desire to warn all the international students to avoid the poutine at VIU and go order some from the New York Fries franchise in Woodgrove Centre, instead.  How could our culinary instructors possibly think that it is acceptable to replace squeaky cheese curds with grated cheese on poutine?  How could they believe that it is acceptable to serve gravy that is almost cold?  Furthermore, how could our instructors not realize that even the Colonel serves nearly three times the same amount of gravy with the same amount of his fries?

In all fairness, the menu-creators at our school may have deliberately chosen to serve a small portion of cheese and gravy on our poutine due to the high amount of fat in this dish.  If that is the case then allow me to point out that low-fat cheddar is even squeakier than regular cheddar, and that fat-free gravy is a flavorful, and common, condiment in most restaurants these days.  Yes, it means that in order to counter-balance the cost of the low-fat cheddar the portion of fries will need to be reduced, but I think that the staff should consider that as a win-win situation, since it would result in even less overall fat content in this dish.

Now I could give a break to the culinary students for this sorry excuse for poutine, since one of my classmates has recently pointed out that I have had more negative food experiences on campus than positive ones, and she has a point, but I will not give a break to the instructors who are teaching our culinary students poor cooking techniques or incorrect recipes, which is the case in point.

It is obvious to me that our instructors need to learn how to correctly prepare poutine so that they can pass along this knowledge to their culinary students.  It is also obvious that they need to change how this dish is served.

For the sake of proper cooking techniques, I am sorry to say that I cannot recommend this dish at the VIU cafeteria.  I am, however, looking forward to the day when the recipe is changed and I can proudly recommend it to our international students.  In the words of Julia Child, "One of the secrets, and pleasures, of cooking is to learn to correct something if it goes awry; and one of the lessons is to grin and bear it if it cannot be fixed."  Trust me—this can be fixed.

Chinese Fried Soup?

In keeping with my promise to review some of my lunches brought from home I'd like to start by appraising one of my lunches from last week:  Chinese pork fried rice with egg in cream of mushroom soup.  Yes you read that correctly; the Chinese pork fried rice with egg was actually in the cream of mushroom soup.

As a student, necessity is the mother of all lunch creations, and it doesn't always end well.  I needed to pack a lunch and all I could find was some cream of mushroom soup and leftover homemade Chinese pork fried rice with egg.  I immediately turned into some sort of mad scientist and thought to myself, "What if…?"

I was uncertain about having fried egg with cream of mushroom soup (leave it to my palette to second guess combining an egg with cream of mushroom soup, but not soy sauce or oyster sauce), so I sorted through the pork fried rice and removed all the pieces of egg --or so I thought—before mixing in a half a can of Campbell's condensed Cream of mushroom soup and ¾ cup of milk.  I then packed it all up in a leak-proof container and hoped that my experiment would be successful.

Allow me to state, before I get into the details of this peculiar flavor combination, just how much we students appreciate the microwaves available to us in the common areas of some buildings, and in the cafeterias.  A hot lunch from home goes a long way to the physical and emotional well-being of most students, and while we may not verbally say so, it should be apparent by the mealtime line-ups in front of these appliances that we are grateful for them.

Once I had waited my turn in line and used one of these said microwaves to heat my concoction, I noticed that the soy sauce and oyster sauce had darkened the soup considerably.  Upon stirring the soup I also noticed that I had missed several pieces of egg.  I was going to remove them before taking my first bite, but thought I would be adventuresome and try it anyway.  Was it worth the risk, or would I have to get out my wallet and buy something from the cafeteria, instead?  It was thoroughly worth the risk! This soup was one of the most amazing kitchen experiments that I have ever eaten.  Who would have thought that this irrational combination would be so successful?  We all know that rice, green onions, peas, and pork tasted good with cream of mushroom soup, but the surprise was discovering that caramelizing the rice and tossing in a fried egg, soy sauce, and oyster sauce, would also complement the soup well.  For that matter, I felt that the soy sauce and oyster sauce enhanced the flavors better than a dash of salt would have.  This was probably the weirdest, and yet the best, soup that I have ever eaten.

I could tell by the expressions on the faces of my classmates when I told them what was in my soup that there are a few skeptics out there who are unwilling to believe that these two foods combine well.  Those folks will just have to try it for themselves some day.  As for me, I am looking forward to the next time that we have Chinese pork fried rice with egg at home, as I intend to make some more of this crazy soup.  The only thing that I would do differently would be to keep the fried egg in the creation.  Not only does it taste delicious, but it also makes it fun to disgust my classmates whenever they watch me take a spoonful.

Not So Mucho Nacho

For those of you who don't venture onto the lower half of the campus, or for those of you who don't have a VIU page in your Facebook newsfeed, you are probably not aware that there is a unique food cart on campus that specializes in Mexican sustenance. I was so excited to find out about it that I nearly shouted, "Ola!"  Of course, if there is original food created on campus I feel obliged to taste test it for the sake of this blog, and it turned out that in spite of its appearance, the food truck is not part of a franchise, but rather is a one-of-a-kind mobile restaurant.

A few days ago I wandered down to the Mucho Nacho food cart and ordered some appetizers to share with my friends.  The menu appeared varied and challenged my decision-making skills, but eventually I ordered the onion rings with chipotle aioli, and the jalapeno poppers in won-ton wrappers with sweet raspberry sauce.  I must say my overall impression of the portion sizes was not good.  I paid approximately $11 and was presented with only about eight onion rings and six small jalapeno poppers.  Compared to the portion sizes and prices in the campus cafeteria, I felt as though I had just thrown away many pesos.  But if the food tastes fabulous, then who am I to argue?  Unfortunately, it didn't quite taste fabulous.

I have to admit that the chipotle aioli that came with the onion rings was quite good, although I was unable to discern if it was made from scratch or if it was commercially prepared.  I would rather dip onion rings in this chipotle aioli than in ketchup any day of the week.  The onion rings were tasty, and reminded me of the kind made by that restaurant that is known for having a bear as a frequent customer (although, clearly the bear doesn't need to dig as deeply into his pockets to buy his onion rings). 

The jalapeno poppers in won-ton wrappers with the sweet raspberry sauce were not what I was expecting.  Instead of the traditional jalapeno stuffed with cream cheese and deep fried until crispy, this was a cream cheese ball with the occasional piece of jalapeno mixed in, which was then surrounded by a won-ton wrapper and deep fried.  As for the "sweet raspberry sauce" that was served with it, I am sure that my jaw fell to the pavement in shock when the employee spooned a dollop of No-Name raspberry jam straight from the jar to the paper condiment cup.  I am not sure when the word "jam" became a synonym for "sweet sauce," but that mislabelling was just plain hilarious.  I am sorry to say that the jalapeno poppers were disappointing.  From the fryer to my mouth was less than 4 minutes Perhaps I should have been this fast? and in that short time frame, they had become cold, both on the outside and on the inside, which was very unappealing.  I also felt that there was too much cream cheese and not enough jalapenos in the filling (and this is coming from a foodie who prefers mild food).  I have to give points, however, for the creative and flavorful use of the won-ton wrappers and the raspberry jam (or "sweet raspberry sauce" for those of you who prefer their condiments to have a more poetic description).

If you are un comedor de rapido, if you are muy rico, and if you are someone who doesn't mind condiments that are no uniquo, then these food items are definitely for you.  Unfortunately, like most students, I am none of these things so can't officially recommend these items.  I can say, however, that I am looking forward to trying some of the other food items from this cart as soon as I can save up enough pesos.

Ham and Cheese Croiss-ain't

A few weeks ago I had the opportunity to sample the ham and cheese croissant, as made by our bakery students at VIU.  I was so excited to try it, mostly because I knew that the VIU bakery program owned an industrial sheeter.  This meant that the croissants would be correctly made with flaky layers of tender pastry in each bite. I was mistaken.

I am fairly certain that what the cafeteria labelled as a croissant is actually a dinner roll that is shaped like a croissant.  A good croissant is easily pulled apart, with the layers quite visible.  This is caused by layers of butter pressed into layers of dough by a sheeter. This process of folding the butter-layerd dough into more layers and run through the sheeter again is repeated multiple times to create the perfect croissant, as demonstrated in this video. Making Croissants with a Sheeter. Sadly, I had to use some strength to pull this dough apart.  A good croissant also has a dough with a neutral flavor, whereas the dough that I bit into was quite sweet, like a Hawaiian dinner roll.  As for the ham and cheese, I was expecting something mild, not the stronger flavor of cheddar mixed with Swiss (and while I have never cared for the flavor of Swiss cheese, I won't allow that to influence this review), and I found that the ham was appropriately portioned.  I must admit that the cheese was waxy, but that would have been easily prevented by warming the croissant in the microwave prior to eating.

Am I being too harsh on the bakery students for not making croissants correctly?  After all, they are only students and are doing the best they can with with the equipment available to them on campus, and industrial sheeters are hard to come by.  No, I do not think that I am being too harsh.  The used industrial sheeter sitting in the lower cafeteria with a sign on it saying to not remove it because it is going to a good home indicates to me that VIU recently became the proud possessors of a brand new sheeter.  Why the students are not using their new sheeter to learn the correct method of making croissants, I do not know. However they should be learning this method, and they should be learning how to use a sheeter.

In spite of this disappointment, I would recommend a (warmed) ham and cheese crescent-shaped bun as a flavorful alternative to a sandwich.  Just don’t think of it as a croissant.

Broccoli-Cheddar Soup for the Student's Soul

On Tuesday the cafeteria served up some broccoli and cheese soup.   Now I know that most students would avoid broccoli as much as former U.S. President H.W. Bush, but not me.  Throw some cheddar into the equation and I am one happy foodie, so it comes as no surprise that I was excited to try the broccoli-cheddar soup on Tuesday.

I heard a rumor that the self-serve soups presented at the cafeteria are frozen concoctions that are shipped in from a supplier.  Personally I don't understand why our school does this when we have a small army of chefs-in-training who should be practicing their skills with making "mother sauces," and soup bases recurrently.  Not to mention that our culinary students need to practice their knife skills (perhaps they could even team up with the music students like this chef).  Nevertheless if a soup is served in the cafeteria at VIU it's only fair to evaluate it.

Cruciferous vegetables are notorious for emitting an unpleasant odor when overcooked, so I was quite happy to note that this soup only bore the pleasant aroma of broccoli and cheddar.  The tiny florets in the soup were cooked to perfection and the pieces of stems in the soup were correctly stripped of their fibrous exterior, leaving only the soft interior (a little too soft for my personal preference, but I would rather have a broccoli stem be too soft than too firm).  I was mostly impressed by the cheese that was in the soup.  I honestly expected it to be made of glow-in-the-dark processed cheese, but the color and flavor of this soup indicated that it only had a small amount of the questionable product in it, if any.  I did not feel the need to add salt, pepper, or condiments of any kind to enhance the flavor.  It was perfect.

Alas, I do have two complaints about the broccoli and cheddar soup:  It is not made by our culinary students, and it is not served frequently enough. Considering that those are my only two complaints, I'd say that this is an excellent chicken broccoli-cheddar soup for the student's soul.

Chinese Comb-oh-no!

Last week the culinary students disappeared from the lower cafeteria, leaving a small handful of graduates in charge of the food preparation.  I had high hopes for the meals this week, as surely the graduates have superior abilities in the kitchen than the students would.  I discovered that I was wrong, however, when I ordered the Chinese combo plate.  It was more like comb-oh-no.

The Chinese combo plate consisted of sweet and sour chicken, a spring roll, stir-fried vegetables, and either rice or noodles.  I had the privilege of trying both the rice and the noodles, and while the noodles and the spring roll were acceptable, they were the only acceptable items on the entire plate.

I was surprised to discover that the Chinese rice I was hoping to get wasn't traditional stir-fried rice.  For that matter, it wasn't even plain sticky rice.  Nor was it plain long-grain rice.  No, the cafeteria actually tried passing off plain minute rice as part of a traditional Chinese combo plate.  If the cooks in the cafeteria think that their customers can't tell the difference in taste between regular rice and minute rice they had better make an appointment with an otolaryngologist.  Unfortunately, the rice wasn't the only serious offence with this meal.  I haven't even mentioned the "stir-fried" vegetables or the sweet and sour chicken yet.

Let's suppose for a moment that you have never had training in how to prepare stir-fried vegetables and you want to make them.  Common sense says that after chopping the vegetables you place them in a wok or fry pan and stir them while they fry (hence the name "stir-fry").  If you wanted to prepare them in the traditional method that a Chinese restaurant would, you then would coat the vegetables in a glaze made from broth, corn starch, and soy sauce.  So how did the cafeteria prepare their stir-fried vegetables?  They steamed them.  That's right.  No stirring, no frying, no other ingredients.  I'm even willing to overlook the non-traditional cauliflower that was mixed in with the vegetables, but I am not willing to overlook the cooking method. Now don't get me wrong, they were colorful and flavorful, but they were not stir-fried Chinese vegetables.

Speaking of non-traditional Chinese food, I must address the topic of the sweet and sour chicken.  Since when is it acceptable to drizzle deep-fried chicken nuggets in sweet and sour sauce and call it Chinese food?  Not in any Chinese restaurant that I have ever been to!  How hard is it for the chefs in our cafeteria to stir-fry (or even deep-fry) some plain chicken pieces coated in cornstarch and top them with a sweet and sour sauce made from scratch just like a Chinese restaurant or home cook would?  And yes, I am accusing the cooks of not making their sweet and sour sauce from scratch.  The neon-red color of the sauce was more like a red flag.  While most traditional Chinese sweet and sour sauce recipes call for red wine vinegar (don’t even think of using ketchup if you're making it in the traditional way), they don’t call for so much of that ingredient that the food would glow in the dark.

On behalf of all the Canadian students at VIU I would like to offer my most sincere apologies to our Asian exchange students for any insult that our cafeteria has caused to you by claiming that this meal was Chinese.  You can take heart in knowing that you were not the only ones who were offended.

Donut Make My Brown Eyes Blue

I may not be Homer Simpson when it comes to eating donuts, but I do have a little more experience in the area of making the sweet pastries than most people.  I have a family member who used to make donuts by the hundreds every day using his own secret recipes, which he kindly shared with a few other family members (including me) before he passed away.  The donuts made using my family’s secret recipes are so good that one taste of them makes the Krispy Kreme variety seem bland.  Of course, it’s not fair to compare an ordinary donut made by a culinary student at VIU to my secret family recipe, so I decided to compare the ones in the cafeteria to the usual donuts sold at most donut shops or bakeries.  Additionally, I was privileged to have some assistance from a few of my classmates for this taste test.  We purchased an apple fritter and a lemon-filled jelly donut, and shared them.  Then we each gave our opinions.

The jelly donut was a delightful surprise.  While the pastry itself did not taste as flavorful as a traditional donut would have if it had been fried in lard (or vegetable oil with some bacon added to mimic the lard flavor), it was nevertheless quite good.  One thing that stood out in our taste test, however, was the genuine lemon curd that the bakery students had used as the filling.  My classmates and I felt that because of this lemon curd these donuts were dramatically superior to other lemon-filled jelly donuts.  I would personally like to add that I found them better than the ones made at Tim’s (please, I beg of you, do not revoke my Canadian citizenship for that statement).  We all loved the tart flavor on the tongue that comes with a genuine lemon curd, and one of my classmates said that she especially appreciated how the filling did not taste like a cough drop.  Would I recommend the lemon-filled jelly donut to other students and staff at VIU?  Absolutely!  But like all foods that are unhealthy, of course I must include the caveat that these donuts should be consumed in moderation.

As for the apple fritter we tried, that is another story.  I would like to say that we divided it evenly and ate the whole thing, but I would be lying.  We each took a bite, with anticipation of more bites if we approved, but we did not approve.  This was one of the worst apple fritters that I have ever eaten.  One of my classmates was disgusted at how raw the dough was on the inside (as was I), and my other classmate’s only comment, which I wholeheartedly agree with, was a concise, “Ew.”  The fritter was mostly raw dough on the inside, had an exterior that was rock hard and looked much too dark than it should have, contained no visible pieces of apple, and tasted like an unpleasant combination of raw dough and french fries.  Cutting into one of the pieces I noticed that the dark brown fry oil had soaked through the exterior of the fritter, a sure sign that either the oil temperature was too low at the time of cooking or else the temperature of the dough was too warm when it entered the oil.  Additionally, the color of the fry oil that had absorbed into the dough indicated that the oil had been over-used and should have been changed.  The dark brown oil would also explain why the fritter tasted like french fries. To say the least, we were very disappointed.  We were so disappointed in fact, that we considered asking for a refund.  Perhaps someday I will try the apple fritter again to see if there are any improvements, but for now my stomach needs to recover.

The over-used cooking oil has visibly soaked through the mostly raw dough

Focaccia or Fork At Ya?

While in the cafeteria this week I picked up a loaf focaccia bread made by the VIU bakery, as I thought that it would be lovely to have some with dinner.  Normally if I am craving some focaccia bread I will either just buy some at a local bakery, or if I am in the mood for a personalized recipe I will make a loaf at home and sprinkle some parmesan cheese on the top instead of coarse salt.  Needless to say, I have tried a few different types of focaccia over the years and was open to finding out how VIU interprets this recipe. 

While the focaccia initially appeared to not have a lot of rosemary on it, I found that there was actually just the right amount of the herb hiding in the dimples.  Additionally, there was just the right amount of coarse salt sprinkled on the top.  The texture of the bread was soft on the inside, yet slightly chewy, and reminded me of my own recipe.  It tasted wonderful after I had slid it through the olive oil and balsamic vinegar on my plate.  I certainly approved of it that night, as did my volunteer taste testers at home.  The true test of focaccia bread, however, is the “day-old test.”  I find that Focaccia from bakeries has a tendency to go stale and rubbery very quickly, almost like sourdough bread, whereas my personal recipe tends to not do that.  I wanted to do a thorough comparison with this focaccia, so I made sure to leave some of the loaf for the “day-old test.”  For breakfast the next morning I sliced some of the focaccia in half horizontally and applied butter and a hot skillet to the sliced side to create a crispy layer of flavor.  I then placed a fried egg on the bottom half of the focaccia and topped it with the other slice to create a focaccia and fried egg sandwich.  I am pleased to report that the day-old focaccia was not too stale and was not at all rubbery. 

This bread exceeded my expectations and I hope to buy some more of it in the future.  Mostly because I wonder how it would taste if I used it to make a chicken salad sandwich…

Thanksgiving in The Cafeteria

On Thursday both cafeterias served a Thanksgiving meal to the students for a very affordable price.  My plate was so full that not only did I turn down the complementary soup or coffee, but I was hoping that I could grab a nap sometime during afternoon classes.  Overall, it was an excellent meal, but there were so many fine details which must be mentioned that I feel the need to break down my review and discuss the individual foods that barely fit onto the plate.

The star of any Thanksgiving meal is the turkey, and to be honest I expected the culinary students to serve up a dry, flavorless, bird.  I was happily mistaken.  The bird was moist, well-seasoned, and as stated earlier, they did not skimp on the portion.  It's not easy to cook and serve a moist and flavorful turkey to hundreds of people so my congratulations to the culinary students for pulling off that feat. It would have been nice to have cranberry sauce included with the turkey, so that was a disappointing oversight, but hopefully it is an oversight that will be remedied by Christmas.

Next on the plate for attention was the dressing.  I would love to call it stuffing, but technically it can only be called true stuffing if it was actually stuffed inside the bird during cooking.  I am certain the biology students would be quick to panic if they were served true stuffing, as the risk of a bacterial-borne illness is greatly increased with that type of recipe.  Thankfully the culinary students must have known that as they put dressing on the menu, instead. Dressing is a touchy subject. It is one of those hit-or-miss recipes.  There are so many variations of it and, let's face it, your mom's recipe is always the best recipe.  For most people, however, the worst recipe for dressing is the one that is primarily made of spices and chopped onions mixed with mushy bread.  Unfortunately, this is what the cafeteria was serving.  No potatoes.  No dried cranberries.  No apples.  No sausage.  Just mushy bread.  It was like eating a handful of croutons that had been soaked in the leftover liquid from a cup of instant noodles.  I nearly cried.  If I may make a suggestion for next time?  If the cafeteria is going to serve plain bread dressing, how about eliminating the mushy texture by baking individual portions in muffin tins?  That way the dressing is less likely to have a mushy interior and the exterior of every dressing portion will have that delicious caramelized crust that everybody loves.  Alternatively, if the culinary students are not interested in baking dressing in muffin tins, they may wish to attempt to get even more creative by making the dressing into a variation of hush puppies by using a small scoop to form them into balls, then coating them in egg wash, rolling them in panko bread crumbs, and deep frying them until they are golden and crunchy.  A little bit of kitchen creativity that I'm sure will be a hit with both the culinary students and anyone trying the dressing that day.

Of course, what Thanksgiving meal would be right without gravy?  I found the gravy with this meal to contain a lot of rosemary.  In all fairness, some people like to have rosemary in their gravy, but I think this may have been a little too much. It was, however, the perfect thickness, and it was nice to see that the gravy did contain some herbs, unlike most gravies served at restaurants.  In spite of the strong rosemary flavor it was a good effort.

Vegetables are frequently overlooked during most Thanksgiving meals, as a vegetable is a vegetable is a vegetable.  But the reality is that vegetables are important both in maintaining good health in the human body, and in making a dinner taste exciting.  I would like to say that I have noticed the menu planners in the campus cafeteria going out of their way for every meal that they serve to ensure that students receive nutritious veggies in a way that is flavorful.  For this I am thankful year-round.  I appreciated the variety of vegetables served with this meal, and they were all delicious and appropriately seasoned.  I must especially thank the students who likely spent over an hour scoring the bottom of each brussel sprout--a task which I am sure may lead to a later discussion on the causes of carpal tunnel syndrome. Click here to see How to correctly prepare brussel sprouts? Too bad that the brussel sprouts were undercooked.  I am going to let that one slide, however, since it is easy to overcook a brussel sprout and nobody finds the smell of overcooked brussel sprouts appealing.  As for the mashed potatoes, they were smooth but not gluey, which can be a challenge when making enough potatoes to serve several hundred people, so they were perfect. 

The dessert.  Oh, my word, the dessert!  Real, thick, whipped cream. None of that phony "edible oil product."  None of that stuff that comes out of a can and dissolves into a dairy puddle within seconds.  No, this was real, thick, whipped cream!  I am happy to know that the culinary students are learning to not take shortcuts on this small detail.  A customer will often accurately judge the overall quality of the food at a restaurant based on the quality of the condiments and garnishes, and the whipped cream on this pumpkin tart was a perfect example.  Case in point:  The little marzipan pumpkin with clove stem was adorable and delicious, although I was surprised to not see an allergy alert posted anywhere.  Are the culinary students not aware that the main ingredient in marzipan is almonds?  As for the little chocolate crunch balls, they were also delicious, although they did not complement the spices in the tart very well. The pumpkin filling itself was fairly run-of-the-mill, and it would have been nice to have a little bit of extra ginger in there, but it was still quite good as it was.  Most of all, however, I must emphasise how amazing that tart crust was.  It was as if some culinary genius woke up one morning and said, "I wonder what would happen if I combined a cookie dough crust with a traditional pie dough crust?"  The Nobel prize for baking, that's what!  I don't think that I have ever tasted a better pie crust in my entire life, and I am not exaggerating when I say that.  If the Pillsbury company wants to offer the creator of this recipe half a million dollars for it, he or she should accept (but first hold out for more money because it's worth it).

All in all, I must congratulate the culinary students for pulling off such an enormous task of Thanksgiving dinner, without stooping to  heavily rely on the folks at Sysco. Well done!

An Introduction to The Campus Food Critic

After much encouragement from my friends I have finally decided to start a blog about the food on the Nanaimo campus of Vancouver Island University.  Sometimes the entries will focus on the cafeteria food, and sometimes they will focus on the lunches brought from home; after all, what student doesn't bring lunch from home?

What makes me so qualified to be a food critic, even though I have never had formal culinary training?  Well, for one I am a student who eats lunch at school just like everybody else and I believe that food should be enjoyed.  I suppose my other reason is because I have earned several local awards for my cooking, and even a national award.  Clearly I am experienced in the kitchen and capable of recognizing good food when I eat it. 

Before I begin discussing the food on campus, however, I must address the subject of my anonymity.  It is paramount that my identity remain mysterious so that the culinary students don't become aware of who I am.  It will be difficult to judge their creations if they go out of their way to impress me for the sake of these reviews.  In that light, I would kindly ask anyone who knows my true identity to please keep this secret to themselves, and I thank you in advance for your co-operation.